Life rarely follows a completely predictable path.
At some point, most of us will experience adversity, whether that comes through difficulties at work, financial pressures, relationship problems, bereavement, illness, uncertainty or a major change in circumstances.
Adversity can affect us in ways that are not always immediately obvious. Something that happens outside the workplace can influence how we feel, think and perform at work, while pressures at work can follow us home and affect our relationships, sleep and ability to switch off.
Learning how to manage adversity is therefore an important part of protecting both our mental and physical wellbeing.
Understanding the impact of adversity
Adversity is not simply about experiencing a difficult event. It is also about how we respond to that event and the demands it places on us.
When we are faced with uncertainty or prolonged stress, the body’s natural stress response can become activated. This can lead to increased muscle tension, changes in heart rate, disrupted sleep and feelings of anxiety or irritability. In the short term, these responses can help us deal with a challenge. However, when stress continues for weeks or months without adequate recovery, it can begin to affect our overall health.
The mental impact can be equally significant. You may find yourself struggling to concentrate, becoming more forgetful, feeling overwhelmed or losing motivation. Things that would normally feel manageable can suddenly seem much more difficult.
This is particularly important in the workplace. Someone experiencing difficulties at home may still be expected to attend meetings, make decisions, communicate with colleagues and meet deadlines. Similarly, someone experiencing pressure at work may find it difficult to leave those concerns behind when they finish for the day.
There is no simple switch that separates our professional and personal lives. We are the same person in both environments, and our wellbeing can be affected by what is happening in either.
Adversity at work
Work can be a positive influence on our wellbeing, providing structure, purpose, social connection and a sense of achievement. However, workplace adversity can have the opposite effect.
Organisational change, redundancy, conflict with colleagues, increased workloads, difficult conversations, job insecurity or feeling that we have little control over our working environment can all create significant pressure.
For some people, adversity can also involve a setback in their career. Not receiving a promotion, making a mistake, failing an assessment or losing an important opportunity can affect confidence and self-esteem.
It is important to remember that a professional setback does not define your ability or your future.
When we experience adversity, it is easy to focus entirely on what has gone wrong. Taking a step back and identifying what remains within our control can help us regain a sense of direction.
This might mean speaking to a manager about workload, asking for support, breaking a large task into smaller steps or simply recognising that you cannot solve every problem immediately.
Adversity at home
Difficulties outside work can be just as challenging.
Financial concerns, relationship difficulties, caring responsibilities, illness, bereavement or problems with housing can create a significant emotional burden. These experiences can also be particularly difficult because they may not have a clear solution.
You may still need to go to work, look after your family, prepare meals and complete everyday tasks while dealing with something that is emotionally exhausting.
During difficult periods, it can be tempting to put your own wellbeing at the bottom of the list. However, looking after yourself is not selfish. Maintaining basic routines around sleep, nutrition, movement and social connection can provide important stability when other parts of life feel uncertain.
Three self-help techniques for managing adversity
There is no single technique that will make adversity disappear. However, small actions can help you manage your response and prevent difficult periods from becoming overwhelming.
1. Focus on what you can control
When something difficult happens, our thoughts can quickly become focused on everything that could go wrong.
Try separating your concerns into two categories: what you can control and what you cannot.
You cannot control another person’s behaviour, an organisational decision or everything that happens in the future. You can, however, control how you communicate, whether you ask for help, how you structure your day and what you do to look after yourself.
Writing down your concerns and identifying one practical action for each issue within your control can make a situation feel more manageable.
At work, this could mean prioritising your most important tasks for the day. At home, it might mean making a phone call, arranging an appointment or asking someone to help with a responsibility.
The aim is not to solve everything at once. It is to identify your next manageable step.
2. Create a reset routine
When adversity occupies your thoughts throughout the day, your brain can struggle to recognise when it is time to switch off.
Creating a simple reset routine can help create boundaries between different parts of your life.
This could be a short walk after work, a few minutes of controlled breathing, listening to music, changing your clothes when you arrive home or spending ten minutes away from your phone.
During the working day, even a few minutes can help. Step away from your screen, take some slow breaths and allow yourself to focus on something other than the problem you are dealing with.
The goal is not to ignore what is happening. It is to give your mind and body an opportunity to recover before returning to the issue.
Regular movement can also be particularly useful. A short walk, stretching session or exercise routine can help break up periods of prolonged sitting and provide a valuable change of environment.
3. Talk rather than carrying everything alone
One of the most effective things you can do when facing adversity is talk to someone you trust.
That could be a colleague, manager, friend, family member or professional support service. You do not necessarily need them to provide a solution. Sometimes being able to explain what you are experiencing can help you organise your thoughts and reduce the feeling that you are dealing with everything alone.
At work, employers can also play an important role. Creating an environment where people feel able to talk about difficulties without judgement can make it easier for employees to seek support before problems escalate.
Remember that asking for help is not a sign of weakness. Recognising that you are struggling and taking action to support yourself requires self-awareness.
Building resilience does not mean ignoring difficulties
The word resilience is often associated with being able to cope with difficult situations. However, resilience does not mean simply pushing through everything that happens to you.
Being resilient can mean recognising when something is difficult, accepting that you are affected by it and taking appropriate steps to look after yourself.
Sometimes that means continuing with your normal routine. Sometimes it means slowing down. Sometimes it means asking for professional support.
It is also important not to compare your response to someone else’s. Two people can experience the same event and respond very differently. There is no correct emotional response to adversity.
Give yourself permission to acknowledge difficult emotions without allowing them to define you.
Looking after your wellbeing through difficult periods
You may not be able to prevent adversity, but you can develop strategies that help you navigate it.
Try to maintain the basics: get enough sleep, eat regularly, stay physically active, spend time with people who support you and make time for activities that help you relax. These habits can seem insignificant when compared with a major life problem, but they provide a foundation for maintaining physical and mental wellbeing.
If adversity begins to affect your ability to function, your relationships, your sleep or your mental health for a prolonged period, do not feel that you have to manage it alone. Speaking to a GP, mental health professional or appropriate workplace support service can be an important next step.
Most importantly, remember that experiencing adversity does not mean you are failing.
Difficult periods are part of life, and struggling in response to them is a human reaction. What matters is recognising when you need support, taking manageable steps and giving yourself the same care and understanding that you would offer to someone else.
Whether the challenge is waiting for you when you arrive at work or waiting for you when you get home, your wellbeing still matters.
Taking care of yourself is not something that should only happen when life is going well. It is particularly important when it isn’t.